I was attending maybe one of the schwankiest wedding showers I had ever not catered. There were ice sculptures everywhere with purple uplighting to showcase the craftsmanship. There must have been 300 people there and every last person was warm, open, hilarious, and joyful-especially the bride. As large as it was, it still felt intimate.
We had to make wedding dresses out of toilet paper and the Bride had to select the winner. I was chosen as the “model” for my table and I was wrapped up in layers and layers of toilet paper. (In hindsight, I should have made a nun’s habit out of the TP-that would have been hilarious. But no one beats a TP thong. Nobody.) The air in the room was electric and even the groom hung out for a while amongst all of us.
After all the revelry, fun drinks,snort laughs, and “awwws” I headed back to my car, put my seatbelt on, stuck the key in the ignition and cried like a baby. I got myself home and, as I swallowed a pizza whole, thought about what happened to cause me that big, bad, Sad.
I love weddings and romance. So why cry? The more I thought about it, I realized this wasn’t the first time I’d felt this way. I think the tears stemmed from the same feeling I got attending a number of wedding events in the last few years. Although it is an honor to be invited to a friend’s wedding, different life choices aren’t celebrated so much. After attending so many weddings, it started to generate thick anxiety that whatever I had going on, as a single, was not worth that much. (For Example, although I have recently started a grad program, no one has asked me where I registered for books. ) Is it strange to wonder why we value one life choice over another to such a large degree?
What other things can we celebrate-as women-in order to be more inclusive to our girlfriends who are making different life choices?